I can be really retarded sometimes

Good Lord.

First off I was driving around half the day uninsured. Because I just completely spaced on paying my insurance bill. It's not that I don't have the money. I do. I just forgot. And it's been snowing all day so if I had gotten into an accident I would have been so fucked. But I am home safe and secure so that was averted.

And here is what really takes the cake for the weekend: I have these really thick callouses on my feet (sexay, huh?). My work Holiday Party is this Friday and I have intended to get a pedicure beforehand but I decided that the callouses were bothering me. So I took to trying to shave them off. With a razor blade. Needless to say my foot has not finally stopped bleeding after an hour now.

I swear sometimes I really wonder about myself.

I think it's the meds. They make me quite a bit more forgetful and ditzy than I ever used to be. It's kind of terrifying, really. Not quite as terrifying as the harrowing two weeks that I spent on depakote in which I almost crashed my car, got wasted at my former inlaws on Christmas and fucked up at a part time job so badly that I shortly quit after that because they were fucktards and couldn't understand the situation. Honestly I barely recall the time I was on that drug.

But it's still a bit disconcerting to have my mind not be quite as sharp as it used to be. I used to be a total whiz, My memory was so sharp I never forgot anything. It's still pretty sharp, but not what it once was. I wonder....age or meds?

I don't have too many other bipolars that I feel comfortable talking to about this subject so I would be curious to know if other people have the same reactions to the meds?

Or is it just me?